What's the Torah?

Sometimes you just know that Cassie is going to take a long time to go to sleep:

Cassie: Mommy, remember at synagogue when the men were dancing with the apples and honey? What were all those red books on the stage?

Nic: You mean the Torah?

Cassie: What's the Torah?

Nic: [trying to dodge] You know that big thing with the round wooden parts that's covered up with a red cover that we all walk around with at services?

Cassie: I don't know what you're talking about.

Nic: Okay. We'll see it next time.

Cassie: But WHAT IS THE TORAH?!

Nic: [taking a deep breath and dreading the next few hours of conversation, but, let's face it, kind of enjoying this]: It's a really important book with lots of stories about God and the Jewish people.

Cassie: Like what kind of stories?

Nic: Um, like remember Passover?

Cassie: No. What's Passover?

Nic: Remember the story about the mean king in Egypt who was mean to the Jews and wouldn't let them go? And God got mad and made lots of bad things happen until he gave up and let them go?

Cassie: Like what bad things?

Nic: [NOT death of the first born; NOT death of the first born]: Um, like he made there be lots of frogs everywhere, and he made people get really bad boo boos called boils.

Cassie: And what else?

Nic: [NOT DEATH OF THE FIRST BORN!!!]: And he made lots of big bugs go everywhere, and he made the cows sick.

Cassie: And what else?

Nic: [NO WAY, I'm not telling her about death of the first born!] And he made the water turn into blood.

Cassie: [Nodding] Why he made the cows sick?

Nic: Usually God is nice, but he was really really angry at the Egyptians. And so the Jewish people finally got to leave, and when they got to the water, God made it split in two so they could walk across, but when the Egyptians got there, he made the water come back so they couldn't chase the Jews.

Cassie: And was the water really really deep?

Nic: Yes.

Cassie: Was it the ocean?

Nic: Yes. [Desperate] Would you like another hot milk?

Cassie: Yes! But first I need to go pee pee!